Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Randomize