what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
They are going to name an STD after you.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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