I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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