I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Do you remember whose house we're in?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
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