It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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