Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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