I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
