Dual....:-)
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
