No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
