i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
