I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
