I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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