I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
its not stalking. its research.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
he just fucked me for my cheese.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize