You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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