Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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