just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
