I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
the gays at disneyland are vicious
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
