we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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