i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
