have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
