just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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