you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
