I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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