I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
