OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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