i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
It was confusing and full of hummus
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
