Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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