Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Randomize
