there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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