I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
