Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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