chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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