hell yes lets make some ravioli
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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