How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
