fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize