If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize