Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
