It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
