Dual....:-)
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
