I'm going to jail i love you
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Randomize
