i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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