hotel room ftw
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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