She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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