he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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