Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
