Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
