When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Who died my cat blue again?
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
