just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
