If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
