he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Randomize
