I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
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