You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
